CELEBRITY SNARK
Large Breasts And Low Standards Extend Tila Tequila's Fame to 30 Minutes
OH, TILA TEQUILA, YOU CRAZY LITTLE SLUT, surely your fifteen minutes MUST be up by now. Because what ELSE can you POSSIBLY do to distract from the fact that you have no discernable talent?
You’ve already had your MTV reality show/farce, A Shot At Love With Tila Tequila, during which you entertained suitors of both sexes to advance your bisexual plotline.
You’ve already been caught making out with the two “it” Z-listers of the moment, Justin Long (a.k.a. "The Mac Guy") and Courtenay Semal (she of the Yahoo! dynasty.) You’ve already actually TRIED the rock band thing (it didn’t exactly work out). You’ve been the Asian Cyber Girl of the Month (whatever that means).
Now you’re releasing a solo album, allegedly dubbed I Have Tourettes. And starting a new reality series in which we get to follow you around while you, I don’t know, brush your teeth and pick up your dry-cleaning?
You've got your ''niche'' market: the one million friends on MySpace who want to see you naked on the Internet.
And that’s the saddest part of it all.
So go ahead, people. Have your shot of Tequila. Just make sure you purge properly when you’re finished – into a trash can.
Miz J, who works in advertising, has tons of opinions and a big mouth to broadcast them across the globe; however, the Internet saves her the trouble of yelling. Check out her blog at Miz J.
SexyChattyCatty contributed to this item.
Posted November 18, 2008
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