Soon: All Oprah's 'Best Life Blah Blah,' All The Time
'O'JOY. SOMETHING TO LOOK FORWARD TO: MORE CONTROL FOR THE WORLD'S MOST BELOVED CONTROL FREAK. Discovery announced that it was handing over creative control of its Discovery Health Network to Oprah Winfrey, who will share equal ownership of the network. By the end of 2009, an estimated 70 million Americans will have the chance to buy-in to Oprah's best-life living blah blah (note: I stole the blah blah directly from Christopher Hitchens!) with the help of acolytes Nate Berkus, Gayle King and Bob Greene. No word yet if Dr. Phil's show will also move to the network of his TV mentor. (We're taking bets not!) This is yet another dream come true of Oprah's with her telling reporters that she happened to find her 1992 diary and specifically its May 24th entry: "I wrote that when I was going through the conflict of the Jerry Springers and everybody was going to trash TV, and I was trying to figure out for myself what I really wanted, in what direction I wanted to go," Winfrey told reporters. "That's how I started thinking one day I'm going to have my own network so I can do it the way I want to do it." Here's a hint to Oprah's intimates: when she dies be sure to get your hards on those journals because they'll be worth loads what with all the fortune-telling that goes on in them. And correct me if I'm wrong, but didn't her days of wallowing in TV's sleaze predate Jerry's?
A cautionary note to Discovery: Are you buying into the Oprah "brand" past its half-life? Oprah competitor Ellen DeGeneres just bumped Oprah from her perch atop the list of most popular American celebrities. Winfrey had reigned at the top of the Harris Poll for the previous five consecutive years. And on an AOL poll asking readers if an "OWN" or Oprah Winfrey Network appealed to them, 78 percent of respondents had voted no.
And once again switching our attention to Britney, America's most annoying celebrity Rosie O'Donnell has joined the Britney Celebrity Defense League. The dethroned "Queen of Nice" has written a sympathetic poem on her blog about sad little Brit. "A Disney set is not a childhood, no matter how many bright colors they use, or how cheerful the script,'' Rosie writes. "Not a girl, barely even a woman yet, they chased her. A mob of stalkers for whom no stalking laws have been written. Smother. Crush. Flash. Photo Credit. Even Dr. ÒGet RealÓ Phil got in on the action. Unreal. 83 million albums sold so far. How many pictures? The tunnel is crowded now. There are only inches of separation between vulnerability and disaster."
It's funny how Crabby likes Rosie so much more now that she has ditched that day-time talk show game.
Posted January 16, 2008
Home
