Richards mocks the size of Jagger's penis, a dig that has gotten him into trouble before.

"Marianne Faithfull had no fun with his tiny todger. I know he's got an enormous pair of balls -- but it doesn't quite fill the gap."

There's no hiding behind lies after 50 years of partnership, and Keith doesn't mince words when talking about Jagger's immense ego becoming unbearable.

"I think Mick thinks I belong to him but I haven't been to his dressing room in 20 years. Sometimes I think, 'I miss my friend'. I wonder, 'Where did he go'?

"Maybe his exclusivity is bound up with his own siege mentality. Or maybe he thinks he's trying to protect me -- 'What does that a**hole want from Keith'? But honestly, I can't put my finger on it. I love the man dearly -- I'm still his mate -- but he makes it very difficult to be his friend."

Keith disses Jagger's 2001 solo album, Goddess in the Doorway as “Dogs**t on the Doorstep": "It's like Mein Kampf. Everyone had it but no one read it."

“

I can't retire until I croak....I'm not doing it just for the money or for you. I'm doing it for me...

”

On his love of drugs: "I'm just waiting for them to invent something more interesting. I'm all ready to roadtest it."

Explaining his relative longevity despite his taste for the warps: "It's not only the high quality of drugs I had that I attribute my survival to. I was very meticulous about how much I took. I'd never put more in to get a little higher. That's where most people f*** up. It's the greed involved that never really affected me. People think once they've got this high, if they take some more they're going to get a little higher. There's no such thing. Especially with cocaine. Maybe that's a measure of control and I'm rare in that respect."

On the perception of him being a junkie: " "I think your persona, your image, as it used to be known, is like a ball and chain. People think I'm still a goddamn junkie. It's 30 years since I gave up the dope! Image is like a long shadow. Even when the sun goes down, you can see it. But it's no exaggeration that I was basically living like an outlaw."

On setting the Playboy Mansion on fire: "Bobby [Keys] and I were just sitting in the john, comfortable, nice john, sitting on the floor, and we've got the doc's bag and we're just smorgasbording ... And at a certain point ... talk about hazy, or foggy, Bobby says, 'It's smoky in here.' And I'm looking at Bobby and can't see him. And the drapes are smoldering away; everything was just about to go off big-time ... There was a thumping on the door, waiters and guys in black suits bringing buckets of water. They get the door open and we're sitting on the floor, our pupils very pinned. I said, 'We could have done that ourselves. How dare you burst in on our private affair?"

On packing guns, particularly when scoring heroin:

On finally recognizing Johnny Depp as the actor instead of his son's jamming partner: " It took me two years before I realized who [Johnny Depp] was. He was just one of my son Marlon's mates, hanging around the house playing guitar. I never ask Marlon's mates who they are because, you know, “I'm a dope dealer.” Then one day I was at dinner and I'm like, “Whoa! Scissorhands!"

On the emotions and memories triggered by a recent trip back to his childhood home over a grocery store where he lived with his father and mother from 1949 to 1952:

"It's almost like you're looking at somebody else. Then you start to feel small things, like the smell of a gas lamp or my grandmother shuffling around and my grandfather going, 'Make the boy some egg and chips."

On the constant chirping from others about him still playing music:

"People say, 'Why don't you give it up'? I can't retire until I croak. I don't think they quite understand what I get out of this: I'm not doing it just for the money or for you. I'm doing it for me."

Life's official release is Oct. 26; currently, it's No. 14 on Amazon's list of bestsellers.