Jen, I don't want to be mean but your taste in men seems to run to the cute but buffle-brained. Didn’t Brad just prove that when he fell prey to Angelina’s bewitching? Once best known for acting, now Brad's better known for being P-whipped and daddy to his own We Are The World remake.

Let's talk about Gerry, who’s looking pretty swell himself. Manly. And you gotta admit that his facial hair is so much more of a turn on than Father Brad’s, who appears as though he’s working hard to keep his vow of celibacy.

You and Gerry obviously like each other enough to hang out, make a movie, feign heat. At your age, that means he’s Mr. Good Enough -- an adequate donor for delivering the jizz of life. And if on the off-chance that all those whispers about Gerry liking dick are true, then the arrangement’s even better! He gets to be daddy without faking it, and you get to be mommy without pledging eternal love and dreariness. And because he’s an actor, he’ll be able to play daddy more easily than most Joes who have to work for a living.

Make it happen, Jen. Make it happen for all the girls who’ve ever been ditched, for the bitter, unmarried women who missed being moms.

Go for it Jen – now. Time is running out.