POLITICS
Here's A Fix For Rush Limbaugh's Oral Depravation
USH LIMBAUGH KNOWS SOMETHING ABOUT ORAL FIXATIONS.
The $400 million dollar man just can't help himself. A quick glance backwards reveals Rush's compulsion to stuff his mouth. The first piece of evidence is that he was a "big fat idot," emphasis on the big and fat for just this minute.
The radio kingpin slimmed down after comedian Al Franken called Rush "fat" in the title of his 1996 antidote to Rush's verbal poison, the kind that causes knee-jerking.
The second, most obvious piece of evidence that he was deprived during what Freud called the "oral stage" is that he can't shut up. Limbaugh has been polluting the airwaves since 1988 when his nationally-syndicated radio talk show first aired.
Interestingly, Freud concluded that those deprived during the oral stage may be preoccupied "with oral activities. This type of personality may have a stronger tendency to smoke, drink alcohol, overeat, or bite his or her nails. Personality wise, these individuals may become overly dependent upon others...On the other hand, they may also fight these urges and develop pessimism and aggression toward others."
Let's see now, Rush goes weak-kneed for Republicans, smokes cigars, gorged himself on food for decades, is the dictionary's face of venom, and doctor-shopped to keep himself supplied with prescription painkillers. (I haven't checked his nails.) If he walked into a shrink's office, that would add up to a lot of clues for diagnosis.
But the most recent evidence of his flawed personality is his innuendo that Elizabeth Edwards should have talked less and given husband John Edwards more blow jobs to prevent him from straying with his baby momma, Rielle Hunter.
"We know — we've been told that Elizabeth Edwards is smarter than John Edwards,'' Limbaugh said on his radio show. "That's part of the puff pieces on them that we've seen. Ergo, if Elizabeth Edwards is smarter than John Edwards, is it likely that she thinks she knows better than he does what his speeches ought to contain and what kind of things he ought to be doing strategy-wise in the campaign? If she is smarter than he is, could it have been her decision to keep going with the campaign? In other words, could it be that she doesn't shut up?" He continues on to say that Edwards' "found somebody that did something with her mouth other than talk."
But do you see how he builds on crazy in one "ergo" false statement after another? Yep, that's a symptom. Rush is mental.
Or maybe he's jealous because he could never land a lady like Elizabeth, pretty and smart with a law degree. His three ex-wives? Choose your favorite between the secretary, the usherette, or the aerobics instructor.
What weren't you doing, Rush, that made all three of them leave you? Maybe none of them could give you what you really wanted. To which I say, put a dick in it.
Posted August 15, 2008
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