The Moment Of Truth: I'm Waiting For The Celebrity Edition
IN THE CARNIVAL THAT IS REALITY TV, THIS ONE ACTUALLY INTRIQUES. That purveyor of popular American tastes, FOX TV, has introduced its latest freak show to wild success, thanks to the hawking of its main attraction, American Idol. Heretic that I am, I must confess that I may have watched one, maybe two, American Idols in its entire run on the air. So I doubt that I'll be running to catch 'The Moment of Truth.' I have them every day in my own living room.
BUT...I can say that I'm already wringing my hands over the possibility of the first "Celebrity Editon." Can you imagine? The public could finally find out all sorts of truths about their heroes. The first one I'd put on the stand is the First Lady of TV, Oprah, and I'd tell her to bring that diary she always mentions that presages her next, great "dream come true," the most recent being a May 1992 entry about owning her own network. Can we see that, 'O' great one? Then we talk to her protege, Dr. Phil, and find out what he really intended when he visited Britney during her brief incarceration in the nut house. And was Oprah really mad at you for the visit?
But, oh, there's plenty more to explore. I'd ask Tom Cruise, 'Is Suri the human hybrid baby born with the alien sperm donors from the Church of Scientology?'
Let's get Baaabra Walters up there and find out what she really told The Donald about Rosie before she quit.
We'd ask Britney Spearsto reveal if she is really in cahoots with the paps. And we'll ask beau, Adnan Ghalib,' Is Brit your meal ticket?'
And of course inquiring minds will demand to know of Tracey Edmonds, Eddie Murphy's faux bride, "Didn't you already know he was a jerk before your make-pretend wedding?
Finally, we could force Sylvester Stallone out of denial when we'd ask him: Did you really think what the world needed was another Rambo picture?
Let me know when that show comes on, and I'll be front and center at the Tube.
Posted January 27, 2008
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